The first time I met my doctor, he found out I was a healer and said "You know, I am a believer." To which I thought he meant Jesus, but which I found out, he was referring to "alternative medicine". Believing, I also later found out, meant that he didn't discount alternative medicine, meaning, he simply felt not enough studies had been done in the field of alternative medicine as had been done in traditional science. Meaning, he wasn't so much a believer but simply not a dis believer, if there is such a category. Later when he still hadn't faxed my medical report to my acupuncturist, even after I had filled out and faxed to his office the proper medical release forms, even after I had already signed on to go the traditional route as well as the alternative one, even after my acupuncturist had already worked with several patients of his, even after I called 3 times requesting it, I began to wonder. Maybe my doctor needed a little Jesus.
When I came in to the office for a visit, having my nurse slip the medical report to me as if in secret, (are we in 6th grade?) his first question was "You aren't going to go alternative on me, are you?" He was afraid. I guess, afraid, that I would just run off into the arms of my acupuncturist and decide tiny needles would route out my tumor, reverse the cancer cells and set me free as long as I took enough Grape seed extract and Turmeric. "I have patients who don't want anything and they come back to me later and I can do nothing for them" my doctor said very sternly but I must admit, with concern. Alternative medicine messes at the extreme. Except I was sitting in his office, having sought him out. "I have never seen a miracle in 30 years" he said. My doctor is a great doctor, read his bio, his education, his awards, his director of breast services at Sloan Kettering, and his research here and his amazing this there, are pretty impressive. I don't doubt that the man is an excellent leader in his profession. Except I guess he never thought to get some acupuncture. I assured him, I was working with the acupuncturist to boost my immune system and for overall good health, and I was for sure working with him and felt the best approach was a blend of eastern and western medicine. ANYWAY, if I ask for my medical report to be sent, that's my business, and you now have held up my herbal blend from getting created because my poor acupuncturist still doesn't have the report. Are we this concerned about some herbs? Come on kids, lets play together and lets play nice. We have some healing to do.
After that, I went to see my acupuncturist. I could tell I hit a nerve. "But I have worked with patients of his--its your right to have access to that! And send it where you like!", he grumbled. He, for the record never ever, recommended I not follow what the doctor recommended, but always affirmed that alternative medicine could help my body in supporting itself to heal from the invasiveness of traditional medicine like chemo and radiation. Although, I have to say I did feel a twinge of the evil eye. " They just don't get it" he grumbled..."They think they know everything". Well, I had to admit, my regular doctor did have a certain doctor cockiness about him and he certainly didn't make me stick out my tongue or take my pulse with his own fingers as my acupuncturist did. I certainly didn't leave my traditional doctor's office feeling more in touch with life, open hearted and centered as I did when I left acupuncture. But, I also know, because of him and his surgeon skills, and countless hours of study and research, had been able to take the tumor out of my left breast. He had gone in and gotten the stuff OUT and in only 90 minutes. Although the state of my breast is not what it used to be. Maybe a few more treatments of tiny needles would have been the better option. Maybe mushroom therapy and meditation tapes would have made it go away as well. All I know is, that major mass of cancer is gone.
Later, that week I went to see my Energy Healer, and found a similar resentment. I told her about the process of mammograms, the squishing, the squeezing, the pressing, the weird angles of arms and shoulders, not to mention the strange metal shield around the waist and throat. If its so safe why do I have to wear a metal shield around my womanly jewels?? I felt like Russell Crowe in gladiator. The mammogram gladiatoress, standing tall with my chest out, except my boob was in a head lock with a machine and I had no tan. And Russell Crowe didnt have the boobs that I have. I have never seen my energy healer get upset before, but she was. "Why do they think squishing and squeezing this thing is good for the breast? I hate those things. They just dont get it!" she said, setting up her table with some force. I was suprised at this can of worms that I had suddenly opened. "Well," I said, "Do you have a better way to to see inside my breast? And please don't say go see a psychic, because I need hard core visuals. On a film, here and now in third dimensional reality". She didn't. So. I will stick with the arm wrestling match with the machine and my metal gladiatoress shields, until someone finds me the psychic that can manifest films of breast tissue. When I need the lord I get on her table and count my lucky stars. We did see Russell Crowe pray in Gladiator at some point, didn't we?
I have heard so much from both sides of the alternative versus traditional sides of the equation of healing, and still, only 3 months into this breast cancer journey, I know this is only the beginning. I feel the tension between the two camps and yet wonder, why are we having "camps" that are separate? We need a Woodstock of revolution in this alternative/traditional friction. Its time to dance in the mud together and be rock stars already. I wonder how doctors and healers can be so stuck on their own sides, when it seems in the interest of healing, both sides contribute fruits of wisdom to be shared and inspire the other. "Cant we all just get along?" Rodney King pleaded. I too plead it here. In the interest of Oneness, lets just keep it simple like kindergarten--share your crayons, fax the reports, respect your elders, don't put others down because they are different from you and make sure to wash your hands after the potty break. Hand sanitizer and incense may have similar effects, remember what Jesus said, "judge not, lest ye be judged" or maybe that was Paul or John or Ringo. Oh gosh I dont know, I just know at the end of the day, we all want our patients to live and tell us we are heros. We all want to dance in the mud with the good drugs and raise our hands in delight at the rising sun. I don't care how many degrees you have on your wall or how many "amazing healers" you have worked with, I know you both care.
When I came in to the office for a visit, having my nurse slip the medical report to me as if in secret, (are we in 6th grade?) his first question was "You aren't going to go alternative on me, are you?" He was afraid. I guess, afraid, that I would just run off into the arms of my acupuncturist and decide tiny needles would route out my tumor, reverse the cancer cells and set me free as long as I took enough Grape seed extract and Turmeric. "I have patients who don't want anything and they come back to me later and I can do nothing for them" my doctor said very sternly but I must admit, with concern. Alternative medicine messes at the extreme. Except I was sitting in his office, having sought him out. "I have never seen a miracle in 30 years" he said. My doctor is a great doctor, read his bio, his education, his awards, his director of breast services at Sloan Kettering, and his research here and his amazing this there, are pretty impressive. I don't doubt that the man is an excellent leader in his profession. Except I guess he never thought to get some acupuncture. I assured him, I was working with the acupuncturist to boost my immune system and for overall good health, and I was for sure working with him and felt the best approach was a blend of eastern and western medicine. ANYWAY, if I ask for my medical report to be sent, that's my business, and you now have held up my herbal blend from getting created because my poor acupuncturist still doesn't have the report. Are we this concerned about some herbs? Come on kids, lets play together and lets play nice. We have some healing to do.
After that, I went to see my acupuncturist. I could tell I hit a nerve. "But I have worked with patients of his--its your right to have access to that! And send it where you like!", he grumbled. He, for the record never ever, recommended I not follow what the doctor recommended, but always affirmed that alternative medicine could help my body in supporting itself to heal from the invasiveness of traditional medicine like chemo and radiation. Although, I have to say I did feel a twinge of the evil eye. " They just don't get it" he grumbled..."They think they know everything". Well, I had to admit, my regular doctor did have a certain doctor cockiness about him and he certainly didn't make me stick out my tongue or take my pulse with his own fingers as my acupuncturist did. I certainly didn't leave my traditional doctor's office feeling more in touch with life, open hearted and centered as I did when I left acupuncture. But, I also know, because of him and his surgeon skills, and countless hours of study and research, had been able to take the tumor out of my left breast. He had gone in and gotten the stuff OUT and in only 90 minutes. Although the state of my breast is not what it used to be. Maybe a few more treatments of tiny needles would have been the better option. Maybe mushroom therapy and meditation tapes would have made it go away as well. All I know is, that major mass of cancer is gone.
Later, that week I went to see my Energy Healer, and found a similar resentment. I told her about the process of mammograms, the squishing, the squeezing, the pressing, the weird angles of arms and shoulders, not to mention the strange metal shield around the waist and throat. If its so safe why do I have to wear a metal shield around my womanly jewels?? I felt like Russell Crowe in gladiator. The mammogram gladiatoress, standing tall with my chest out, except my boob was in a head lock with a machine and I had no tan. And Russell Crowe didnt have the boobs that I have. I have never seen my energy healer get upset before, but she was. "Why do they think squishing and squeezing this thing is good for the breast? I hate those things. They just dont get it!" she said, setting up her table with some force. I was suprised at this can of worms that I had suddenly opened. "Well," I said, "Do you have a better way to to see inside my breast? And please don't say go see a psychic, because I need hard core visuals. On a film, here and now in third dimensional reality". She didn't. So. I will stick with the arm wrestling match with the machine and my metal gladiatoress shields, until someone finds me the psychic that can manifest films of breast tissue. When I need the lord I get on her table and count my lucky stars. We did see Russell Crowe pray in Gladiator at some point, didn't we?
I have heard so much from both sides of the alternative versus traditional sides of the equation of healing, and still, only 3 months into this breast cancer journey, I know this is only the beginning. I feel the tension between the two camps and yet wonder, why are we having "camps" that are separate? We need a Woodstock of revolution in this alternative/traditional friction. Its time to dance in the mud together and be rock stars already. I wonder how doctors and healers can be so stuck on their own sides, when it seems in the interest of healing, both sides contribute fruits of wisdom to be shared and inspire the other. "Cant we all just get along?" Rodney King pleaded. I too plead it here. In the interest of Oneness, lets just keep it simple like kindergarten--share your crayons, fax the reports, respect your elders, don't put others down because they are different from you and make sure to wash your hands after the potty break. Hand sanitizer and incense may have similar effects, remember what Jesus said, "judge not, lest ye be judged" or maybe that was Paul or John or Ringo. Oh gosh I dont know, I just know at the end of the day, we all want our patients to live and tell us we are heros. We all want to dance in the mud with the good drugs and raise our hands in delight at the rising sun. I don't care how many degrees you have on your wall or how many "amazing healers" you have worked with, I know you both care.
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